The Day I went Mad - Short Story

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Madness
It all came to me in one fell swoop - a moment of inspiration, if you will.

"Who are the mad men, the insane?" - I wondered. What separates them from the rest of us? They are able to eat, drink, sleep and do numerous other day to day activities just like the rest of us. It seemed to me that the only thing that separates us from them is a concern for the outer world, for society's norms. A "sane" person would not talk to himself or pick his nose in public even though he would when alone. He would not suddenly burst out laughing or start singing aloud - again in public.

Thus, all that separates the sane from the "insane" is an awareness of society around him and the use of a mask in public - a mask to hide one's true feelings. A mask to appear "correct". A mask to be socially acceptable at the expense of one's own individuality and originality. A mask that implicitly hands over power from the individual to the group.

True art is an expression of one's inner self, one's spirit as is evidenced by two popular sayings. First - "An artist dips his brush into his own soul". Second (attributed to Picasso) - "Art is autobiography". Thus artists have to plumb the depths of the subconscious, the inner self, the spirit to create anything original. This can be a frightening experience because … well, it is a trip into the unknown and a lot of the facets not accepted by society and even oneself are tucked away in there. Some succeed in this inner search and come out strong. They develop a faith in themselves, in their spirit and appear to society as head strong, opinionated individuals. Artists, as the stereotype goes are head strong. One can even argue that one has to be so, to create anything original. To create something that breaks accepted boundaries, norms and crutches and then to have the strength to stand behind it.

"But", one may ask - "do artists really feel that they are mad?". Well, its known that a significant number of the good ones do. The number of artists who have been in mental institutions is legendary. Van Gogh had to admit himself to one. The surrealist painter, Salvador Dali remarked - "The only thing that separates me from the mad men is that I am not mad".

All of this meshed so well and clicked so perfectly that I suddenly realized I knew to the day when I went mad. It was the day I started painting seriously.